(147) – Disappointed!

Do you know that feeling when you’ve sacrificed for the wrong thing or the wrong person? When you thought you were doing the right things and helping others on their way to the top? When you loved someone and decided to let them be the companies of your life? When you trusted them blindly and never assumed they’d screw you up one day? When you used to be at their beck and call but the moment you need them, you never find any? Or when a misconception happens, you swallow your pride but still they refuse to admit their fault?

Honesty is required but openness is optional. We are open and frank only with the ones we love and trust. You’ve told this/these individuals all you had in mind and never held a nice word to cheer them up. You were always willing to forgive and even forget once you glance them or even know that you’re going to see them. That’s not love I think, that’s faith in people, a belief they’ll never attempt to disappoint you.

Nonetheless, life goes on and they become on your unwanted acquaintances list. I know you’ve waited so many hours, days or even months to hear from them but they never called back. I believe you kept your mobile phone close, in case you get any text message, a call or even a like on Facebook from them but they never did.

That’s because you were pursuing the wrong stuff, yes, stuff. And that in particular was me, myself. I took the wrong bet, held the wrong hand and befriended the wrong ones. Things like this happen, it might also be very normal but not after I did my best or after such an endless sacrifice. I was always concerned about quality not quantity but quality seems to be faded away today. The point was not to get anything back in return, it was unconditional and sort of loyalty as well as affection to these things, those fake friends.

That feeling is called “disappointment”. I am very disappointed and shocked, I’m surprised and astonished. I was unvalued yet; I deserve it because I let others value me at the time I was supposed to value myself.


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