(138) – Remember?


When we first met I didn’t think you’d give up on me one day and that you’d be more committed to someone else, someone who would never be able to love you the way I do or be able to understand you the same exact way I do. When we first met I was willing to sacrifice my life, my time, my duties and responsibilities only to make you happy. And yes, I did, don’t you remember? Don’t you remember the days and nights I left my family and spent it all with you? I knew you were lonely and homeless, I realized you needed someone to be with you all the time and that you wanted to talk and talk and talk… I still remember our first meal together, you were gorging food like you hadn’t had anything in years but you know what, it was never annoying nor weird. I loved you the way you were and believed in your potentials.

Back then, I didn’t want anything but to see you smiling and laughing all the time. Remember when you told me I’m nuts and feminine? Actually, I’m not dear, I was just acting that way deliberately; don’t be surprised, that made you smile, that let you forget the old days. Even though, I accepted your false judgments and took that as a compliment.

Remember the tears in your eyes? When we were sitting on the front of my car? Or when we were sitting in the car with the windows closed and the sky falling down? You were staring at the sky and asking why you? I do remember, clearly. Do you have any idea what I felt back then? I wanted to hug you, to hold you tightly, to wipe up your tears and replace them with a grin from ear to ear. I wanted to make you feel my love, my care, my fondness.

Remember when I said you’re spontaneous? I meant it; your simplicity kills me, your spontaneity is what obliges me to always be at your beck and call but that doesn’t mean to take me for granted, that doesn’t include my hurt feelings and emotions. You know I love you and I’m very jealous, you know that I’d never like to be just another friend of you. Well, that should encourage you to keep me close, to keep me in and take care of me. That sounds dumb and silly but I’m serious, I’m very serious about it.

You know the statement “do no harm but take no shit”??? I’d put up with your shit, you did thank me for that one day, as usual, I took it as a compliment but up to some extent, I’ll do harm, I’ll hurt you and challenge you only to prove that you don’t deserve my love. Even if you’re spontaneous, I’m not to be messed with.

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