Oh God, you must know very well how much I love you and believe in you and your destiny. I know all the words somebody might say about you, I know you love me and want the best for me. I am pretty sure you want me to be better and achieve more; I really know you don’t send me tests but to help me out and be the one I always wanted to be.
But God, it’s killing me; I’m upset, sad and lonely. Although I know the answer, I know it very well but still I need to ask why! I have too many “why’s” for which I need a verbal answer. It’s not polite nor right to ask you why, yet I just cannot keep it inside, it’s beating the hell out of me; I’m confused, I’m lost I’m burning and dying a thousand times everyday facing my unanswered questions, I am hopeless without you, give me an answer, provide me with a solution.
God, I don’t dare to ask you why, I will never be impolite taking to you, so please help me. I cannot bear this anymore, I’m broken-hearted; I gave off the most invaluable thing to my heart. I knew from the very beginning it’d hurt me very much, I’m trying to coexist, trying to compromise but it still hurt. The old days, laughter, smiles, good times, I cannot forget, I just cannot. Help me, please!!! I’m hopeless without you, I’m poor and submissive, I don’t want to go against your laws because I love you and believe that you have much interesting things for me.
You are the only one knows about my sacrifice, give me patience, help me out, I’m truly stuck and cannot seem to help myself. I promise to be good and straight. Don’ test me with those I love, they are very few and every one of them is just in the right place. (tears…)